For days the two of us stare across
the platform at each other, I always make sure to get to my train platform at
the same time every day so I can see her. I don’t know what I will do if one
day she isn’t there.
Finally, I get my courage up, climb
up the stairs and cross down to her side of the platform. “Hello,” I barely
whisper with my eyes on the ground.
I mumble in a quiet voice unused to
speaking to other people about anything except yes or no or chicken and garlic
sauce at the Chinese take out place, “I’m so lonely. I saw you looking at me.
Can I ride with you?”
I get a real shock when Cindy
gently takes my hand and simultaneously pulls my hoody back,
She hesitates and says, “Yes.” She
is thinking what am I doing with this boy. He look so strange with sequins on
his face, yet he looks so sad and lonely and under everything really handsome.
Dare I talk to him? How can I let him ride with me on the train? Is it safe?
Something makes me want to get to know the real person under those horrid shiny
metal sequins.
For some reason I guess she feels
drawn to me, makes me feel good.
I hold her hand all the way out to
her train stop, I can feel her pulse beat. Her hand is so soft. We don’t talk
until the train pulls up at her station except to mention our names.
I say, “My name is Billy what’s
your name? Can we go for coffee?”
Cindy nods her head yes, smiles
shyly at me and says, “Yes, my name is Cindy.”
I didn’t realize how pretty she is.
She guides me across the street to a local coffee shop, and for the first time
in years I speak about my life and myself. Words and emotions came pouring out
of me about my loneliness, and my drunken stepfather, who used to beat me. I
can’t stop. I cry. I feel so foolish, but I think Cindy doesn’t mind. Somehow I
think she understands what real loneliness is. Somehow I think she
instinctively knows my heart. I can’t believe how fast everything is happening.
I have real feelings for this girl. I just wish she talked more. She says so
little. I wonder what she is holding back.
