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Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Johnny Oops The Virtual Adviser

Hi, I’m Johnny Oops and I’m a genius. What’s your story? Are you tired of not living up to your potential? Don’t worry; I’m here to be your virtual advisor. With me at your side you can realize all your goals and dreams. Isn’t it wonderful?

The first thing I want you to do is to make a short list of what is most important to you and then post these goals in the comment section of my blog. Don’t worry if you are shy about what you really want to do. I have heard it all before. After all I am a virtual spirit, I go on for eternity. You can’t imagine the kind of stuff people have revealed to me. That brings me to an important point. For this to work you are going to have to use your imagination. To start with you are going to have to imagine that I am real. You do have an imagination, don’t you?

Now to some general thesis that are inhibiting you from achieving your dreams and goals – around these parts we don’t have rules, we have thesis. Remember this is all being done on a virtual basis so I assume you are virtually always correct and don’t need to pay attention to rules. I know that I am a virtual genius and almost perfect. Stick with me and you may become almost perfect too. I really can’t help you become a genius. Either it is in the genes or it isn’t, but I can answer your questions, which for some of you is as close as you are going to get to being a virtual genius.

You may well ask how I arrived at this stage of enlightenment. I will tell you the truth. I have spent a near eternity listening to other people and the garbage they carry around in their heads. Sorry if I sound irritable. How would you like to listen to all this nonsense? Then on the basis of all I have heard, I have formed a point of view – a virtual opinion if you will. Let me tell you it isn’t easy living with all the crazy dreams and goals some of you people have.

No, I can’t conjure up a beautiful blue-eyed blond for you no matter what sex you are looking for. In my case I don’t do sex. I have been around to long to really care. If you want a virtual girlfriend or boyfriend you are on your own. What you do with them once you find them is none of my business. I don’t even remember how that works.
No, I can’t make you rich. I don’t do money. Maybe that’s why I’m poor. If you want to be poor; that I can show you how to do.

Yes, I can help you help yourself with your health problems, its called disease prevention. It’s a do it yourself fixer upper. We tell you where to go to get the information to help fix you up. If you are too far gone that’s too bad. You should have started worrying about your health earlier.

I can even show you how to stop drinking or smoking or eating too much. I have and the only thing left is breathing, but since I’m a virtual person I don’t have to worry about that.

Do you have anything to worry about? Tell me what the problem is. Maybe I can’t help. Even if I can’t, it will do you good to talk about it. Remember that I’m your virtual adviser so we don’t have to get too personal, just real friendly if you know what I mean.

So let’s get to work and see how well we can perfect you would be geniuses. What makes you happy, what makes you sad, what do you want to accomplish. The time is now. Seize the moment, get rid of your inhibitions, use your imagination, and post me a comment. You do want to become a virtual genius, don’t you? The world and I Johnny Oops are waiting to hear what you have to say.

To find out how to become a virtual genius and perfect yourself please visit


  1. I have a headache that won't go away. What should I do?

  2. i have a spiritual path to follow but do not know where,why ,how or why i should follow it...especially which fundamental religion to follow exept the usual and predictable catholic traditional cristian roman ,,that prolly is the one that i should folow anyways,,,,,your opinion???
    thanks ...johnnywired

  3. Follow your heart and your instincts.